A few months ago, there was a change in my approach to Street Fighter IV. While I’ve taken the game seriously for awhile now, there was a very different motivation driving my play. At first, it started out as a focus on getting better. But as that improvement happened, I noticed that I was within reach of some lofty milestones. When I realized that being the #1 ranked Rose and Cammy player in Canada was within my reach, I made the conscious decision to put all of my gaming energy towards meeting those goals. For better or worse, mission accomplished.
During that two-month stretch, I played Street Fighter IV almost exclusively. I played every single match like my life was on the line. I celebrated hard when I won, and was unbelievably salty every time I lost, as each loss put me a few steps back from my ultimate goals. While it’s great to have a strong motivation to drive any of your actions, this drive wore me out emotionally. Losses would often end with me letting out a scream, followed by a slamming of my fists onto my fightstick, or sometimes, throwing whatever throw-able object I may have close by, just to get the negative energy out.
I did not like having that feeling in my body as much as I had it during that run. Of course, the only balance to that was winning, which seemingly got more difficult as I got closer to my goals. This is where my run wore me out physically. I played Street Fighter with every free minute I had. You may have noticed a lack of content on In Third Person relating to anything other than Street Fighter of late; mainly because of this run. I would even routinely sacrifice sleep just to get in a few more matches every night to get myself closer to the goal. It got to a point where it was negatively impacting other aspects of my life, and I didn’t like that at all.
At a certain point, after I reached #1 in Canada on the Rose leaderboards and was close to #1 on the Cammy leaderboards, I asked myself, “Is this worth it?” Is going through all of this trouble worth it in the end? By the time I got this far along, I wasn’t even that concerned about getting better, which was the original purpose of this run. By the end of it, all I cared about was having the most points. I knew that I wouldn’t stop until I ultimately got those points, but taking a step back to think through what was going on helped me re-focus my approach.
So here I am, Jett of In Third Person fame, who can now claim to be the #1 ranked Rose and Cammy player in Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition Version 2012. It feels good to be ‘at the top’. But I think I’m more excited to let go for awhile.
For the time being, I’m going to take a break from competitive Street Fighter play. I achieved my initial goal of getting better, and managed to turn that into #1 on the XBOX Live Canadian leaderboards for two separate characters. I did some leaderboard research, and only one other Canadian shares that same distinction. To me, that’s way more than what I set out to do. With those under my belt, I’m now going to let go of the obsessive behaviour, the sleepless nights, and most importantly, the salt running through my veins. I’ll still play the game to stay sharp and to have fun, but without the weight I carried on top of that.
Have you ever been driven to the point of obsession over a video game? I’d love to hear your point of view or personal experiences with it in the comments!
In Third Person 